Monday, July 17, 2006
Bottle this feeling
I know that this is my last baby. We have always known it was going to be 2 children for us, no matter what genders we were blessed with. So I'm trying to hold onto this precious feeling for as long as I can. My last pregnancy. Certainly there are things about pregnancy that I don't like - nausea, weight gain, exhaustion, and constipation (sorry!). But there are things I just adore, and wish I could "bottle" up to hold onto forever. I love my bump! I think it's so cute. It's not a little basketball bump that is so coveted by moms-to-be, but I like mine just fine. It's round and bulges just ever so slightly to the left, where little man likes to hang out most of the time. I love talking about the baby, wondering who he will take after (like there's any true question), and asking Jackson what he thinks about having a brother. But most of all I love the feeling of movement. I think it is one of the most amazing feelings in the world. It's exhilarating. I love feeling him flip and flop and kick and punch. So far it isn't too hard, so I may retract that statement in another month or so. But for now it is so miraculous and amazing to know that a little human being is growing inside me. He gets into a comfy spot and hangs out there for awhile, then moves around trying to get comfy again -- just like his Daddy at night. During the day we are so busy running around that I rarely notice him. But at night, when Jackson is in bed and Shawn and I are just hanging out, he comes out to play. We play a game - I push into a side of my tummy, he kicks back at me. Already I know he's a playful one. He settles down after about an hour or two of kicking and cocoons into my left side for the night. A few more modest kicks and jabs, maybe a tiny tickle with his toes, and he sleeps. I just so wish I could memorize and save that feeling forever. It is precious. And I will miss it when he joins us in the big, bright world that awaits him.