Thursday, May 10, 2007

Jealous

I am jealous of my husband. I admit it.

Jackson is a huge daddy's boy. Always has been really. I have to admit though, that has he's gotten older and more verbal, it's starting to hurt my feelings. It's silly, because he's just 3, but I can't help it. Nine times out of ten, he wants and asks for his Daddy. I do so much for my son - I cook, clean, sing, dance, make up games and songs, plan activities, make muffins, make beds, set up play dates, plant flowers, pick up poo that doesn't make it to the potty....and yet, it is Daddy he wants. All day long Jackson tells me how much he loves and misses his Daddy. He cries when Shawn leaves for work. He is elated and celebratory when he returns from work. The tears at bedtime when he says goodnight to Shawn would break anyone's heart.

He won't kiss me goodnight anymore, just Daddy. He boots me from his room so they can have their "goodnight dance." I told him earlier today that I loved him and asked him if he loved me and he said "Actually, I love Daddy best." Ouch.

I know he's just going through a major Daddy phase, but it hurts. I should be happy - Shawn is such a wonderful father, and I know that is a huge reason why my son is such a daddy's boy. He is so much fun and loves to play and talk and dance and read to him. I'm so lucky in that respect. I know most mom's would love a husband as attentive as he is. But sadly, I feel jealous that my son would rather be with him than me if given a choice. I guess that's the way it goes for this stay-at-home-mama... maybe I should have continued working. At least then I'd be missed...

2 comments:

zjoeynosmom said...

Aw, I know the heartbreak:)

Joey went through the same phase & now he is starting to favor me more.

Olivia is currently in her "daddy" phase & he is the world to her right now. She still likes me, but the excitement she exudes when she sees him is unreal!!

Although we both work, our kids see me more than DH. I "take care" of them way more than he does. The small doses of him that they do get are precious.

Hang in there!! Your boys love you dearly, they just don't know how to be fair about it yet LOL!!

Hugs,
Amanda

Lana said...

Wow. I just went through that phase. My boy was even worse. He would say "I love daddy, I don't love you" because he saw how upset it got me. It was a game to him. My husband leaves for work very early in the morning. So when my boy got up, I would come into his room. He would immediately throw himself on the bed, screaming his head off crying and and sobbing and yelling "I want my daddy. Get out. Go away. Get out" and that was on repeat for WEEKS, even MONTHS. Thankfully, he stopped doing that now and returns to loving his mommy. I couldn't believe how hurt and jealous I was. Glad it's all behind me now... but who knows, maybe my other little one will get into that phase soon enough.