Sunday, April 29, 2007
Wednesday, April 25, 2007
If you are out there, give me a shout. I'd love to hear from whoever might be browsing along. I would also like to put to rest my still-lingering-20-years-later Jr. High School pains of being incredibly shy and unpopular.
Oh, and my kids were especially cute last night. Shawn was stuck in traffic due to this icky late April snow we just got. So I was desperately trying to get a fussy baby nursed and off to bed, while my almost 3 year old (who refuses to nap) was having an epic meltdown. Eventually they both ended up in my arms in the rocking chair in Holden's room. How I managed them both is beyond me. Holden nursed. Jackson snuggled. The both passed out before I got to the 2nd verse of "Baby Mine." Awesome. I loved that moment so much I cried. It was one I'll never forget. Both my boys, quiet and sleeping snuggled up in my arms. That is bliss.
Speaking of "Baby Mine..." So I have a college degree in theatre. Yes, a very useful Bachelor of Fine Arts in Acting and Directing. Most people look at me quite puzzled when I tell them this because the natural reaction is "and what did you do with that degree?" My answer -- easy, I became a marketing-manager-turned-stay-at-home-mom, of course! Anyway, I think I was a fairly decent actress in college. I was in some pretty good shows (in my very humble opinion) and won "Best Actress" and "Best Acting Student" two years in a row at the theatre department's annual awards banquet. But I sucked as a singer. Seriously, I was dreadful. I could fake my way as a dancer, but the singing was horrid. I can admit that. As a result, I did very few musicals during my tenure. One to be exact. And believe me, there was no solo or duet for this off-key warbler. Nevertheless, at auditions each fall and spring of my University career I had to audition for each season's shows. That included a monologue (no problem) and a song (big problem). I dreaded that part of auditions. Probably the casting folks did, too. I remember distinctly my first college audition singing "Baby Mine" from Dumbo. I also remember, very clearly, all my friends making fun of me for choosing this song. And for my performance in general because, like I said, I can't carry a tune. But I was determined. I sang it with all my heart because I think it is a beautiful song... and I totally sucked. And a few of my friends reminded me of this sucking for years to come. It was that bad. But I loved that song and still do. When my first son was born I sang it to him all the time. It is sweet and gentle and even off-key, he didn't care. The Better Middler version of "Baby Mine" is on his nightly CD. He's listened to that CD every night since he was 4 months old. Now, 3 years later, anytime I sing any song from that CD he stops whatever he's doing, smiles at me, and sweetly says "that's my song." He doesn't care that I suck. He doesn't care that I can't carry a tune. I'm his mama. And he's my baby mine. And my college friends can bite me. Because the most important judges of my singing are my two boys. And they think my voice is angelic.
Tuesday, April 24, 2007
So these two blankies survived infancy, and bypassed all the other dozens of blankets that were given to us at the time of Jackson's birth, to become the blankies. Jackson cannot sleep without them. They are drug up and down the stairs all day long. They sit with him at lunch. The roll around the floor with him in the playroom. They snuggle with him in his bed. They are capes, make-shift tents, and parachutes. They are also stained, smelly, and gross. And he will not let me wash them. I repeat: he will not let me wash them. That isn't to say that this germaphobic mama doesn't wash them; it just has to be a very stealth, covert mission. I have to wash them first thing in the morning when he's hyper and running around and not in need of a nap or a snuggle (who am I kidding -this kid rarely naps or snuggles anymore anyway). I have to wrap them up in a disguise of sheets or towels, run with them to the washer downstairs, and dump them in and start the wash (on HOT) before he notices. If for some reason he does require said blankies while they are washing or drying, I have to distract him. I throw on his favorite video, or pull out the bubbles, or in desperate times - offer him cookies. And on the rare occasions I have been discovered washing and drying the blankies, a meltdown of epic proportions usually occurs. He wails and screams that he does not want his blankies washed. If they are in the dryer I usually pull them out -- even if they are slightly damp-- and thrust them into his tearful, heaving arms. Then he will usually cry and scream that he doesn't want warm blankies. He wants them cold!!!!!!!! NO WARM BLANKIES!! So I flap the blankies around until the delicious warmth leaves them, and they return to their cold, stained state. (oh yes, those stains are there for life -- and I'm a stain removal queen!) The tears usually subside within a half an hour or so, and life returns to status quo. Until the next covert blankie washing mission.
Monday, April 23, 2007
Wednesday, April 18, 2007
A rare picture of myself with one of my boys. Jackson and I goofing off after our zoo day yesterday. Oh man, I love this kid. (ps - still doing great on potty training - woo hoo!)
Holden, chilling out, eating some grub. I can hardly believe this little guy is almost 6 months old. I swear it feels like just yesterday I had him. He is becoming so fun and funny - he has as squawk like a pterodactyl. It's damn cute!
I call this picture "a plate full of choking hazards." OK, that isn't funny since he actually did choke on a hot dog a few weeks ago (he's fine, but scared the poo out of Shawn and me). But I noticed that almost everything on his plate is considered a choking hazard for small children - turkey hot dogs, whole grapes, mini carrots (and some tomatoes - those aren't hazardous).
And finally, Holden's first ride in a swing. He wasn't sure of it at first, then he just sort of chilled out and enjoyed the ride. Again, the squawking was outrageous.
I really think he looks a lot like a "Broome-child" in this picture. Our genes live on!!
Sunday, April 15, 2007
Saturday, April 14, 2007
Friday, April 13, 2007
Oh, and just so Holden doesn't get left in the cold -- today he burped so loudly that both Jackson and I jumped and shrieked with surprise. It was SO loud! My little guy is growing up so quickly.
Ah yes, I definitely have a household of men!
(oh, and we have also had 2 accidents...but Rome wasn't built in a day!)
Way to go little man!!
Wednesday, April 11, 2007
Sunday, April 08, 2007
Friday, April 06, 2007
So I have let go of my anxieties and frustrations about it all, and have embraced being an "EBF" mama. EBF = Exclusively Breast milk Fed. It's a term used widely in breastfeeding circles. I have a few friends who are EBF mamas, mostly from my uber-fabulous mommy-message board that I belong to. I always sort of looked at them in both awe and confusion. Awe that they could be the sole provider of sustenance for their child. And confused -- Why would you want to be the only one feeding the baby? Why wouldn't you want your husband to help? Why wouldn't you want to be able to leave the baby for a few hours without worrying that the baby was going to starve? Now that I have sort of been forced (for lack of a better word) into this position, I look at it all very differently. I am a proud EBF Mama! Aside from 1/3 serving of baby food that he currently gets per day (minuscule really), I provide 100% of my sweet boy's nutrition. That is amazing to me! The female anatomy amazes me once again -- in its ability to nurture a being from birth to one year with almost all necessary nutrition! And free nutrition at that. That rocks.
Even more than that, Holden and I have a pretty special bond because of our circumstances. He survives because of me, and in a way, I survive pain-free because of him (if you've ever weaned a nursing child before, you know what I mean by that). It's truly a miraculous thing in my eyes. And to see my sweet little guy, warmly nuzzled up next to me, his finger curled around my thumb, happily eating away -- it melts my heart. The act of nursing a child is as old as time (they didn't have Playtex bottles 500 years ago!), but every time my child latches on I feel a bit like it's the newest, most amazing feat. And it makes me adore him even more. So here I am being an EBF Mama, and I couldn't be prouder or more pleased. My hats off to all my EBF mama-friends. Now I totally get it!
Wednesday, April 04, 2007
1. Jackson sat through his first full story time at the library!! This might not seem like a huge feat to some, but for my wild-child, it's huge! We have tried doing story time several times over the past few years, but Jackson doesn't like to sit still. I can't blame him. A kid's gotta move! But I have always watched the other kids sit there so quietly and enjoy the story time, and wondered what it would be like to watch my own child enjoy that activity. I love books. My Granny was a librarian, plus all the educators in my family -well, it's ingrained in me to love books. I want my children to love them, too. And Jackson does love to read... at home. He'll memorize books after just a couple of reads. (My mom is amazed by this talent. I think it is pretty cute myself.) But get that kid in a group setting for story time and forget about it! He does not want to sit still! So we gave up story time last year and now just check out books and look for the dolphin statue when we are at the library.
Today we were there getting some books to take home with us. Jackson noticed all the other kids sitting in the reading room listening to stories. It had been over a year since I tried taking him to story time. He looked at me wide-eyed as if to say "What are they doing in there?!" I smiled and told him he could go in and listen if he wanted. He smiled an enormous grin and sat down on the brightly colored rug with all the other kids. He listened so attentively. And when it was time to participate - with songs or hand motions, there was my kiddo, happily joining in. He was the most excited child in the room. The other moms were giggling at how excited he was -- as was I. I was never so proud of him! When it was all over he jumped up and down shouting "Hurray!" and clapping his hands. He even looked confused that the other kids weren't all shouting and clapping as well. The librarian even stopped to tell me how good he did! I beamed! And called Shawn right away to share the good news. Maybe he won't get kicked out of preschool after all!
2. Holden ate peas today and loved them.
Big day, big day...
Tuesday, April 03, 2007
Every night Shawn and I put on our game faces. It's bedtime. There's no argument. Period. Bed. Now. Now! NOW! Then the yelling begins. Jackson screams and yells and throws a typical tantrum (at least I hope it's typical)refusing to clean up his toys, brush his teeth, put on his jammies, go into his room quietly, read a book, you get my drift. It's a war! And Shawn and I are so worried that if we give an inch - say, maybe not make him pick up his toys for one night -- he'll take a mile. We're convinced that if we don't stick to the routine, he'll end up as the class-punk whom all the teachers dread having in their classroom each year. We are convinced he'll be kicked out of preschool before he even starts. He's a strong willed child, to say the least.
Bedtime usually takes a good 30 minutes, when it should take 10-15. He's an expert staller. He wants water. His blankies. His red car. One more story. Mommy or Daddy, whoever is not in the room at the time. You name it, he'll ask for it. He will be an excellent debater when the time comes.
Then, when we do leave the room -- at last -- his pleas for us to return bearing gifts of milk, songs or snuggles does not end. It's a nightmare before sleep even comes. Then, eventually, the quiet comes and he sleeps. And he is peaceful and calm. I slip into his room and the face that was scowling at me in anger and frustration is soft and dewy. He's sweet and gentle and almost makes me want to weep with how innocent he is. And I fall madly in love with him all over again. And we wonder what the fuss was all about...until the next night when it starts all over again!
Monday, April 02, 2007
Today Jackson's foot made a farty noise when he drug it on the floor. He turned to me and said:
"That was my foot, not my bottom!"
That's too good not to write that one down!
(ps this picture has nothing to do with farting, I just thought it was cute!)