Saturday, January 31, 2009

A day like today...

It has been a difficult time around our house lately. I don't know how else to explain it, but as it goes, sometimes being a parent is just really hard. Really. I am guessing the boys are feeling the stress of our lives in general -- see previous posts with all the goings on -- and they act out on it. Especially Jackson. I don't often like to post "down in the dumps" types of posts, but it has just been a crummy day...

J is such a spirited child. I'm learning that is the proper, positive "label" to give him so that I don't put out negative words like, oh, being a general pain in the ass. I mean that with love. But he is a very persistent, demanding, and dramatic child (no idea where he gets that from, ahem...). And during times of change or stress this part of him really shines. Lots of tantrums and yelling and feet stomping. He's only four! Shawn and I look at each other exasperated, bewildered, unsure of what the "right" thing to do is. We love this child, unconditionally, but that doesn't mean we have to love his behavior, or even like it all that much. And as smart as I think Shawn and I are, we are often at a loss as to how to cope with this behavior. It is definitely unique. HE is definitely unique. It is the thing we love the most about him. It is also the thing we find most challenging.

So it is 7:00 on a Saturday evening. Our boys are both in bed. It is all we could think to do with them after a day of tantrums and emotions and fits. Shawn and I are exhausted from a day of refereeing and combat. It wasn't a fun day. Some days are just like that I suppose. And I wrack my brain, search through my "parenting books," looking for answers. Love them they say. Love them unconditionally, and they will turn out fine. Yes, I suppose this is true. I hope it is. I pray it is. Because sometimes the love part is all we know how to do.

3 comments:

jimbroome said...

Hang in there Amy!
Jackson will do fine.

Pikette said...

You two are wonderful parents and someday our "spirited" boys will rule the world (in a good way:) ). Hang in there. I've been there too.

CharleyJax said...

I'm sorry they're being so hard on you, Amy. I assume you've read my parenting Bible "Raising your spirited child" ??? If not, seriously. It has helped me understand my Jax's behaviors. It doesn't mean I don't want to shoot him... often... but it helped me understand, and that has helped a LOT. (Of course, he's only 2.25, so God help me in 2 years!)
B