Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Good bye to Avery

Two years ago when Jackson entered Preschool, he instantly became friends with a pretty little girl with curly hair and big, soft eyes named Avery. Every day he went to school he came home talking non-stop about Avery, Avery, Avery. He wanted to sit by Avery. Play on the playground with Avery. Read books next to Avery. She was the only friend he talked about. In fact, I would say that she is the very first friend he made independent from me. All his other friends have been a result of my own developing friendships. So it was really special to see him form a friendship without any interference from me.

The following year when Jackson entered the Pre-Kindergarten program at the same school, he was beyond thrilled to find that Avery was once again in his classroom. And he naturally fell back into step with talking only of his best friend Avery after school each day. He was even known to have to take a time out at school for throwing a bit of a tantrum when he couldn't sit by Avery at snack time.

A few months ago Avery's mom mentioned to me that they were moving to California for Avery's daddy's job. I was sad to know my little guy's friend wasn't a forever-friend. I personally have a few that I knew from preschool through to high school, who I've been so lucky to recently have gotten back in touch with via online social networking (aka Facebook). I guess I was hoping Jackson and Avery would have that same kind of friendship. But it was not to be...

On Monday I found out today would be Avery's last day. I took Jackson into my lap at home, and explained to him that Avery was moving far away, and would no longer be in his classroom. It was hard for me not to be emotional, as I watched him try and comprehend this information himself. He sort of grasped it. But not really. I'm sure he didn't really "get" that his best pal wouldn't be there to laugh and pal around with any longer. I wish I knew a better way to explain it. But then again, at the age of 14, I watched my best friend in the world pull out of my driveway, heading for her new home far, far away. It was horrible and lonely, and at the time, one of the saddest things I had experienced. And honestly, I don't want my son to experience that kind of sadness. I think he's too little to feel that deeply about a friend anyway, at least I hope so.

Today was Avery's last day at school. Jackson made her a card -- which he signed himself "To Avery, Love Jackson." I admit it, I cried when I read what he wrote. He did it all by himself, without even spelling help from me (though Love was spelled Luve). And after class he gave her a big hug good-bye, and told her he would miss her. Is my little guy really only 4 years old? Because his good-bye showed the maturity of a much older child. It was sweet and sincere, much like the friendship Jackson and Avery have.

Avery and Jackson on Halloween, 2008

4 comments:

jimbroome said...

I remember when I was 12 years old, and leaving my old country, England. I remember all my friends that I had to say goodby to. It was such an ordeal knowing that I would probably never see them again. Tom Somers, Peter Hill,Tommy Creagan, Barbara Smith(my first "girl friend", and many others...

Debbie said...

Poor little guy! I have to admit it has been a few weeks since I have had time to sit down and catch up on you guys and wouldn't you know the first blog I read has me crying.
Love ya'll,
Debbie

Tales from the Crib said...

It IS sad, isn't it? But he's adjusting fine, and actually his teacher said he's playing with all the other kids now, integrating himself more, so I think he's gonna be just fine.

Clover said...

We went through this a couple of months ago with significant trauma. It was heartbreaking. :( I am glad he's doing alright. Maybe they can be pen pals?